☽ Blogging ☾

First entry🦇 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪

Tonight, on a cold, stormy evening, I created my blog. I am thrilled since it took really long and I finshed before my bedtime (yes I do have one I set myself since I wake up early to go to high school and I like to sleep). I cannot wait to learn more about coding and update my this website since it looks...okey (?) until now. Today I studied some film screenweiting structures like the three-act structure and the hero's journey. These structures aren't something you REALLY need but they are something to add to my knowledge !! Until we meet again, Good night my cinnamon rolls ‧₊˚🕷‧₊˚

Update ݁ ˖ִ ࣪

It's the 15th of October, and soon will be my birthday. I can't say I'm super excited this year since I choose to spend one day celebrating with my family and the other, specifically the 26th to roam around Bucharest's old town and visit thrift stores and my favorite place, Carturesti Carousel, which is a big bookshop. I play to buy myself a few items like a journal, probably some albums, candles and Halloween themed stuff since my birthday is 4 days before Halloween !! But in all seriousness, October is the month of depression, it's Depression Awarness month. All I want to say is that if you struggle with this, you are seen, you are supported and I encourage you to step out and ask for help because that is the first step to getting better. (at least that was what I was told). Whoever is reading this, take care of yourself and don't let anyone tell you who you are☠︎︎ ⋆₊ ♱

The Romanian club tragedy ݁ ˖ִ ࣪

For those who aren't aware, a decade ago a big tragedy in Romania occurred. On the 30th of October many young adults went to the ''Colectiv'' club to have a good time...but that night didn't end well. The club caught on fire killing almost all the band members who were supposed to sing and 64 other people. I was too young to know about this tragedy but as I grew up and heard about it, I am heartbroken still. But I want to talk about the fact that many people which were burned and were suffering because of the pain, couldn't even be helped because Romanian hospitals aren't taken care of. At that time and even now, after 10 years, hospitals are still infectious and unclean. It kills people that have a chance to live. Why does no one speak about this ? Why does no one care ? Why do we have to send the poor people in other countries to have a chance at life ? We barely have any beds for mild and easy burns and none for extreme burns. We need to step up because if another tragedy happens like this one, the outcome will be the exact same. People will die because of the dirty and infectious hospitals and everyone will keep saying ''We are in control'', when really we aren't and will never be.

The hate against women in Romania ݁ ˖ִ ࣪

Every woman's life is threatened right now in Romania. Not directly, except for some, but there is a growing problem that has been blooming since the begining of the year. Until now, November, there has been 51 cases of killed women. A femicide is happening, not only in Romania, but world wide aswell. Women were killed, in front of their children, not only taking the poor being's life, but also stealing the child's innocence. A total number of 51 innocent women were killed. I couldn't be more dissapointed because no one is protecting us. I feel at fear whenever I leave the house, and usually I leave early and come back really late from school so the situation makes my evenings terrifying. I am affraid for not only my life, but for my sister, my cousins, my mother, my aunts, my grandmother, my neighbours, my friends my classmates and so on. I'm affraid I might wake up one morning and find out they are the 52nd case. I won't keep my voice down until these women's killers are dying in prison where they belong to be. May they rest in peace, all the women our system failed to protect and save.

My comforts ݁ ˖ִ ࣪

Hello ! In comparison with my latests blogs, this might not be my usual awareness raising rants. I wanted to open myself a little and share the things which bring me comfort and peace, as a very anxious person who runs on stress everyday. Get to know me !! My comfort things : spicy food, especially the lime and hot pepper combo, my lamp because it glows yellow light and it's really comforting, when I'm in the bus and I have music on a low volume, lying in bed when I'm sleepy and it's warm and my blankets and pillows are comfortable, when my plushies are really warm and I get to cuddle them, drinking lemon tea to cure my headaches, watching Moosa Mostafa's streams (he has such a comforting aura and voice he's my shayla), listening to the perfect song at the perfect moments, finding a piece of media from my childhood, rewatching my childhood shows and youtubers (ever after high is the best example), being complimented on something specific, or more detailed compliments, wearing my comfort pants and hoodies, sleeping my dark thoughts or sickness away, helping others with whatever whenever I can, specific hugs which I cannot explain what they are but I know that they are full of emotion and longing. Thank you for caring enough to read this and I really hope I didn't sound cringe. Take care of yourself and take a moment to journal your thoughts !!

Romanian's national day ݁ ˖ִ ࣪

On the 1st of December, romanians worldwide have celebrated the National day of Romania, the day when the country united and became whole. But for me, I couldn't hate this day more. Not because I hate my country, it's beautiful nature and amazing food, it's ineresting traditions and gorgeous national costume. But because I hate everyone who runs it. Today, the 52nd case of femicide happened and it hurts my soul to see women, my sisters being killed or harmed. I hate the fact we have the second heaviest building in the world and at the same time we are number one when it comes to CHILDREN, UNDERAGE mothers and the most alchohlic people. I detest the fact we have the biggest church nowdays but people are dying on the street (which I have seen on my way to high school) and in the dirty hospitals and children are being forgotten in small, without good teachers schools. We are sugarcoating everything, I cannot wait to grow up and leave this coutry because I have no real future here, no matter how much money my father has. All I want to say is that I hate the people ruining my country more then I hate myself.

My style, in my vision

Double upload in a day, yayyyy !! I know my friend will be very happy to see this (shoutout to my queen Eve for being my biggest fan at the moment) I have decided to explain as good as I can how I would describe my style. My personal fashion icons at the moment are Helena Bonham Carter, Alice Cullen and Jessicka Addams. I like the 80s goth look with lots of blacks and greys but with also a bit of colors, since I love myself a little bit of purple, red, or blue in my outfits. Fashion sense wise, I want to dress a combination of whimsy goth, romantic goth and casual alternative outfits from the 2000s era. My 'favorite' brands are little to none but I like myself some Vivienne Westwood jewelry, corsets from Gotica and....well these, I usually prefer and try to get clothes from Vinted (whenever my mother let's me of course). Sooooo, I would say my style would be something Helena B. C. would wear if she would be a whimsy goth ? Or a romatic goth !!!

My biggest problem at the moment

I have decided to take a few things off my mind because I feel guilty to tell others. I have a big problem with some of my classmates. I think they just got way too comfortable and it pisses me off the way they so casually bully and judge others. One of my boy classmates (I won't be giving any names for their safety) keeps making jokes about my classmates and it makes my heart clutch when I see that since, I myself have been bullied my whole life. And my friend, my deskmate who I have tried to get close to since school started shows me everyday that I don't want that anymore. She makes fun of my classmate because she's ''fat'' and ''ugly'', something I don't support nor believe. Then she has the audacity to call herself alternative. Alternative folks do not judge, not if someone is ugly, not if someone is different, not if someone is weird. I don't care how she labels herself, my problem is that she judges everyone for everything instead of just minding her own business. Anyway, I am very tired since I finished a stressful week of school and I might take a great to study more since I don't want to fail. I'm waiting for Moosa's next stream to properly relax and for the winter break since I desperately need it.

My dream roles ݁ ˖ִ ࣪

As a future director, screenwriter and producer (HOPEFULLY), I realised was asked if I might consider acting in movies aswell. And, most likely I will, but only if I am offered or I audition for some really specific roles. Not because I would consider myself too good for other roles, but I think these fit me better !! Now, here are my main roles and reasonings : 🦇 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪Knight/ princess knight - I think I would fit this role because my whole life I had been called a boy because I have ''manly'' features and I love independent women in an armour....but only if it's written right !! 🦇 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪A variant of spiderman - As a spiderman fan I would DIE for a role in a spiderman movie. My favorite variants are Ghost-spider, Spider-punk and Silk but....I don't think I fit any of them sadly. But, maybe if they create another variant.... 🦇 ݁ ˖ִ ࣪The villain in a horror movie - Think some type of classic horror like Scream or Scary movie...I don't know why but I would be thrilled to have an opportunity like this. I have many other ideas but I think these ones are the best I could think of. Unfortunately, I don't consider my face worthy for the camera so, do not expect me to appear in any movies soon. Anywho, hope I didn't bore with this post.

Thank you, Kohei Horikoshi ݁ ˖ִ ࣪

Today, the 13th of December, marks the day when My Hero Academia, my first ever anime ended. I would like to thank everyone that worked on this anime for making me fall inlove with animes and make my childhood better. I still remember the days when I was 10 and I would yap to my cousin about Kirishima and Sero, how much I loved Jirou, who I thought the traitor was, how mad I was because of how much hate Uraraka would get etc. I wasn't able to finish the anime since I am really lazy and while it continued I was battling depression but it will still hold a really special place in my heart. If I weren't to watch this anime, now I probably wouldn't be watching Soul Eater, Death Note, The promised Neverland, Kakegurui, and many more animes that had played a special role in my development. Soon, another show that I deerly love will end, the amazing digital circus. And though I'm sad because of it, all I can do is reflect on my earlier days and appreciate how passionate (and really really fucking cringe) about My Hero Academia. Thank you, the writters, designers, illustrators and the voice actors which graced my vision and hearing for the first time in 2020.

My how to get over a breakup ݁ ˖ִ ࣪

As some may know (my friends I mean), I recently have gone through a really bad breakup. And I won't lie and say that it didn't break me even though I knew I didn't love that person before we broke up anymore. It's okey so grieve and suffer especially if that person was a big time of your routine and I will leave a few pieces of advice if anyone needs them. Firstly, do not and I mean DO NOT search for someone to take their place. You need time to heal from any wound that might have appeared and searching for another partener is not the solution. Take a few days, maybe even weeks if you need to understand what's happening, let yourself be angry and accept it in the end. Realise that there's plenty fish in the sea and do not, DO NOT harm yourself in any way (please seek for help if you feel like it's the best option, everything will be fine). And if you want change something about you. For example, I'm trying to convince my mother to let me dye my hair, I became calmer then I already was and replaced my caffeine addiction with tea for my health. Also, do not stalk their socials, it will only fuel your anger and jealousy !! All I can say is that everything will be alright, focus on yourself and see the better parts of the situation !!

HAPPY NEW YEAR ݁ ˖ִ ࣪

This is the first blob entry I am writing in 2026. I would like to say a few words about my 2025, since it was one of the worst years in my life. I went through many hard moments, like 8th grade and the exams before high school, a really hurtfull break up and I lost many people. But those moments are gone and I want to focus on doing everything I haven't or didn't have the courage to do last year. I want to thank my friends, who I won't name to respect their privacy and my cousins, who are like my sisters and kept me in check while I was losing my mind. This year carried many sad and breaking deaths like Sam Rivers, Ace Frehley, Perry Bamonte and many other innocent sould who had the misfurtune of not having geographical luck, or are considered ''normal'' by the others. This year I will be more confident in myself and I will try my best to convince my father that my dream is not a waste of time !! I'm grateful for everything that led me here, to realising my worth and what my path in life is and I hope everyone's year will be as good as I wish to be. Happy New Year and have a great year !!